Ahh, Chad Ochocinco. Although some view him as a clown in the media for his crazy antics and his life on Twitter, no one can take away the fact that he’s never been in trouble. Okay, he’s had a few fines from the League Office for his on-the-field stunts, but off the field, his rap sheet is pretty damn clean.
He took to his website and wrote his peers on how to stay out of trouble – in his own Ochocincoish ways, breaking it down by the AFC (Alcohol, Firearms, Crews) and the NFC (No-Man, Fallback, Consent)
It’s a pretty good read, and some of these guys should really take a look at it. He’s kept his nose clean thusfar in his career, and I’m sure he’ll continue to stay that way.
He started out by saying “It’s unfortunate that a lot of my peers have been getting into some serious trouble this off-season. What is it like 28 now? I have lost count. Thus, I figured I would share with you the 6 AFC and NFC acronyms I use to stay out of trouble. Excuse the Ebonics by the way, it is a more fun way to really express how I feel about this.”
He then breaks down the AFC:
So you want to get wasted. The dumbest –ish you can do in 2012 is publicly party like it is 99. Mofos in the club will be live tweeting your buffoonery for the world to see. You are in the NFL, making millions and you got a mansion. Bring the party home dammit.
No need anymore. We out the hood now. Get a bodyguard if you are still that paranoid.
A Crew is not needed. Just ask Drake and Chris Brown. Roll solo, it will save you money and trouble.
And then the NFC:
Deion Sanders taught me this. You badly need a no man. Someone that tells you what you don’t want to hear like
“Are you really finna smoke, drink and of all the cars you got, you gonna drive the Ferrari to the club tonight and carry your gun with you? C’mon fooool, you gonna be on the next flight to go see Goodell”
Keep your NO man closer and yes men farther.
You are famous and there are people that will hate and test you. You can’t deal with it the way you would when you were in the hood. You need to just fallback.
Be careful of chicks and groupies. Those consenting smiles are sometimes fake. Sooner or later you might be defending yourself in a frivolous sexual assault case as she tries to stick you for your paper. Yes, some of these women “Stay Schemin”. There is a simple solution. The iPhone has an HD camera now. Make sex tapes all the time. It will make great memories and save you trouble.
He then ends his letter with a nice subtle signature, telling the players that if they follow these steps, they won’t have to go visit Roger Goodell:
If you apply these acronyms, it will save you trips to @nflcommish and you know he ain’t playing around these days.
Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson
Pretty good advice from someone that hasn’t been in trouble – and a fun little twist on it. To view the original post by Chad, you can click here to read it.
Follow us on Twitter @DownandDistance
Sports-Kings Executive Editor – Justin Arbogast @NFLGuy_SK